important XX

over 100 messages in the my babe sharp.
they were all from my babe friends.

24hours.
i really dont want love someone anymore...so tired...sad...hopeless...
also let my babe friends worried about me ...
this time, even my dear papa and mama...so sensitive
actually, i am fine.just tiring to love,but no one love me...haha

haha..maybe i am so seriously love him this time.
i am not saying "i love you"for fun.
i am honesty for love.
i know the difference between love and like.

i wonder,maybe i believe HIM too much.
since last time, HE really saved me from hell.
HE really let me see the hope again.
HE really listened to me.

i always wait.
i always do what i need to do best,
i really thanks what HE gives me.i really know i have to cherish.
i always practice myself better and better for the one HE will gives me.

i pray with HIM, and i was surprising what i pray really happened.
i almost believed thats he was in HIS PLAN. 欣喜若狂.
but...
i almost cant believe HIM now.

i try to find answer. i asked him why.
if this is the lesson that HE wants me to learn.
fine.
i cant say anything.

i think i need to understand HIM more.
to decide whether believe him completely again.

but anyway.
i cant let ppl who love me upset, when i was upset.
my emotion connect with them.
they knew what i suffered in the past,
so they were afraid thats would happen again.
no.i wont let them happen again.

i cant give up .
i am still optimist, thats all because of them.
believe in love,believe in friends.believe in faith,believe in dream.
they taught me to believe whatever i faced, just be strong.

all will become history.

no matter how pain i get, thats not important.
let me become your supporter. 你们开心才是我要看到的．这样我才会安心．

mum said.i was her everything.
so,she must be stronger to go through what she is suffering.
papa said,he wanted me to be a happy girl forever,thats why he named me with the meaning of happy.
so...i need to forget bad things.
i have to forget.
what let me upset,what let me cry....
no.no more.

我不知道未来是什么样的．
是我的，不管过多久都是我的．
虽然ＨＥ这次真的让我很失望，让我怀疑我对他的信仰．
可是，我会等他给我一个合理的解释．
反正我一直都在等，
也不在乎继续等．
就象往常一样，在等的过程中，继续努力完善自己吧．
虽然生活总是让我不如意．
可能大概是自己要求太高了吧．．．但是要求低了生活就没意思了．
我只想要对我来说重要的人，可以开心他们没有爱错我．
可以骄傲他们没有挺错人．
至少知道他们的短信费没白花．．．哈哈．．．

我就是执着，就是不认输．
越是不可能的事情，我越是要尝试．．．
既然有人可以做到，我也可以．．．
虽然这过程中总把自己弄的头破血流，把身边的朋友弄的鸡犬不宁．．．
他们说，我什么时候能成熟一点啊．．．有把握的时候再做．
我说．不成，等我有把握了，那没准就没机会了．

干什么都傻乎乎的．
所以现在也没人相信过去我对世界有多绝望．
就算我乐观，我对一切充满美好的期待，
可是，不知道的人也不会知道其实我心里的伤已经可以让我看淡一切不好的结果．
所以，我的不开心，只有最亲近的人知道，
我可以接受，只是不代表我会开心的接受．

其实爱情对我来说，是个奢侈的东西，
我期待真爱，可是我害怕．
爱上一个人，不是一瞬间的心动，是一种持续上升的感情．
所以，也不是他说＂不能再爱他＂就不爱了．
当喜欢上升成爱了．．
我就彻底不能控制了．
感情不是人自己可以控制的．至少我不能．
所以，既然他说ＨＥ会告诉我谁是对的人．
那我就等着，看他是不是ＨＥ给我的那个人．
不然，曾经发生的一切，都是徒劳，何必发生呢？

不知道为什么写这些，
不过．留着以后看吧．